Thursday, June 17, 2010

Birthday 37 - One year on in the city

It's been a strange day or so. Nearly everything technological has balked when I've tried to accomplish practical work. From the school's network, to the machine for loading money onto my laundry card, to my PC deciding that its security software had expired promptly at midnight, it's been a twenty-four hour period of machine mischief centered on my birthday. At the same time these are all small problems easily overcome by making minor adjustments.

That and several things that I've been waiting on with regards to planning my immediate future finally resolved themselves today. Chief among them was receiving the dates for the Writers of the Future awards ceremony, workshop, and book signing.

I'm seeing all kinds of omens in the events around me once again. The feeling I have from all of this is yet another shift in the order of things. One similar to the the wave of odd signs that seemed to be haunting me in the spring of 2008 when I was preparing to move up here.

Only this time it's more a set of shifts around me. No far reaching changes in the world to ride out, but rather a reconfiguration in the local realities of my life. It's a sense of fluidity, of adapting, or hitting a kind of stride within a larger set pattern.

I still wonder brings on these episodes. Normally I am an empiricist and rationalist, and yet there are these stretches of odd insights that presage significant events or periods for me.

Some kind of subtle stress below the level of conscious awareness? Or is this some strange bandwidth of intuitive analysis. One thing I've learned in this life is to never underestimate the perceptive ability of the pre-rational brain--a computational system with millions of years of trial by fire in the context of evolutionary fitness.

True or false, the sense of connection and interrelatedness with the world at large is profound, and it seems like a healthy way to live. That and it really does seem to work well for me when making major life decisions.

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